Problem Attic. Insert witty tagline here.

As you can probably well tell, I’ve been running a bit low on decent blogging material recently. So, in deference to that and allowing for the fact I still want to write stuff, I’m opening up a suggestions box.

The rules are this: comment on this post with a suggested topic or post title (as zany as you like) for me to write about. I’ll pick my favourite (or several, if there are a few I like), and in the next couple of weeks write a reasonable length post on each of my picks.

So, fire away…

“I am bitterly in love. I can’t stop thinking about Brehaut.” — AJ

…a music review which begins with the line “This is probably the best Norwegian military waltz I’ve heard all day.”

[Link]

Main Characters:

• Mick: Crocodile Dundee himself, a classic Aussie outback bloke
• Wal: Mick’s best friend
• Sue: A New-York Reporter, city-savvy and sophisticated

In the Outback:

• Mick will attempt to shoot Wal. If this fails to happen, Wal will try to shoot Mick instead. Fortuitously, however, the bullet will only graze the shot party in either an incredible piece of sharp-shooting (if Mick is the shooter) or because the shooter is “a bloody lousy shot” (if Wal is the shooter).

• A situation will arise which can only be solved by Mick creating a Macgyver-like trap from an item of Sue’s underwear. Of course, this means Sue is no longer wearing said piece of underwear.

• Mick will meet up with his Aboriginal adoptive brother, who—while on first glance seeming your traditional bushman—will exhibit suprising sophistication, and a humurous lack of bushcraft. He will probably also accessorise his loin-cloth, staff, and war-paint with a fancy wristwatch.

• Mick will use conventional methods for something, and then try to cover it up with bogus bushcraft, i.e. looking at his watch before he tells the time from the position of the sun, or shaving with a safety razor before whipping out his huge knife and pretending to shave with that.

In the City:

• A token representative of a subculture (hispanic, skinhead, transsexual etc.)—or a group of those from said subculture—will attempt to take advantage of Micks completely naiveté regarding big-city life. Hilarity will ensue until Mick tires of the game and threatens someone with his huge knife. (“You call that a knife? Thees is a knife”)

• Mick will act out his ignorance of city life, and either destroy someone’s evening (for instance, by mistaking cocaine for a cold remedy and tipping it into a bowl of hot water), find himself apprehended by the Police (for instance, by dynamite fishing in Manhattan harbour), or simply completely embarrass himself (for instance, by yelling “It’s for washing your behind after you go” out a hotel window down to the street.)

• No matter how fancy a bed is available, and whether or not Sue is in it, Mick will sleep on the floor beside the bed.

Far out! Crocodile Dundee (the first one) was released in 1986. I feel old.

The Polyphonic Spree were featured on Scrubs. They are a 12-piece band sounding a little like The Arcade Fire, and they have an official flash game.

Scrubs

Grey’s Anatomy

Well, they could almost be the same people.