I hate swimming

December 2007

I hate swimming.

When people ask me "what do you want to do with your life?" the question always sounds like "are you going to come play in the deep end with the big kids, or are you going to stay mucking around at the shallow end?" My answer is "I'm sick of swimming; I never liked it much anyway. And the chlorine is making my eyes water and my nose run. I'm getting out of the pool."

Trouble is, most people don't seem to realise there's something outside of the pool. To them, you're in the pool or you're dead. By definition.

I want to tell them that there are other pools. There's a tribe down south who let their pool freeze over so they could ice skate on it. A tribe out west drained their pool, and they use it for skateboarding.

And I've heard rumours of a tribe far to the north, up on the edge of the tropics, who abandoned their pool altogether. They let it grow green and scummy, full of weeds, and they went to live by the sea.

That sounds like my style.

Jody commented:

I've been thinking lots about this post. I think actual swimming is great, but I get your deep metaphysical point. Then I saw "Into the Wild" (which needed half an hour chopped out of it to be really good) and I didn't have a problem with the guy going off to Alaska without a map and dying. Many people are really down on him however.